I ask you a question?” I’d been dying to ask him this for years, but the old me
had been too afraid.
his knees and locked a hand around his other wrist.
want to break up every year after camp?”
the white stitching on the embroidery that outlined Madison’s initial.
voice was low.
terms than risk something going wrong during the school year.”
given him reason to doubt me.
after my mom left us.” He reached for a stick to shove the logs around in the
dusty fireplace as I marveled that he’d finally admitted what I’d
suspected. When Seth’s mom abandoned
him, she’d left a huge hole. No wonder he had trust issues. Still, we could
have worked through that if he’d given me a chance. Opened up to me like this
always figured I’d wait to get serious with anyone until I was… really sure,”
appearance, but his tone was dry. “I was hoping this would be the year we’d be
ready to take that step.”
chest felt so tight that for a minute I couldn’t breathe. We’d been so close to
developing something amazing.
against the cabin, making a squeaking scrape.
wasn’t just that.” He put the stick down and looked at me. Really looked me.
“You showed up as someone else.
Someone I didn’t recognize with a new look, clothes, interests.”
opened my mouth to protest but stayed silent when I followed his gaze to my
didn’t know who you were anymore,” Seth went on. “Since when did you prefer dancing
to stargazing, tanning to pursuing your Aerospace Scholar dreams? That wasn’t
the Lauren I knew. Loved.”
deep as a knife? Seth no longer loved me because I’d changed.
ironic that I’d come back to camp to get back to the things I’d loved,
especially Seth. But Matt had stopped that chance and, suddenly, I was glad he
had. What was so wrong with liking dance and
astronomy? Cheering and the science club? The popular and the outsider cliques?
The problem was, I hadn’t realized I could do both, be both. If I’d gone back to Seth, I would never have learned that.
looked over at my drying wedge sandals by the fireplace. They were awesome,
even if they had slowed us down. And yeah, I was the girl who worried about
weather-induced hair frizz.
maybe I had changed. And Seth had a point about letting my dreams lapse. But
why couldn’t he see through the make-up and clothes to the person who still
thrilled at the site of a meteor shower and drew constellations on her notebook
laid back, tired of justifying myself. “That girl’s gone, Seth. I’m different
stretched beside me. His amber eyes searched mine in the shadows between us, a
wistful smile lifting the corners of his mouth.
his fingers toying with my curls. “I just miss the old you sometimes.”
touch, knowing it wasn’t going any further. After all, he cared about someone
else, someone I’d never be again.
I edged a little closer to ease the empty ache inside. “…so do I.”